the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
