So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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