we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
