So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
