Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
