if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Just pee around me
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Randomize
