Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
