sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
