Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Sry I called you an 8
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
