nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
