it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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