I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize