nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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