don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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