She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize