her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
