he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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