Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
My bed smells like the plague
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
