You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
