I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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