part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
