Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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