Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
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