nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
