I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
