the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
