Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
