just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
