i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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