i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
