I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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