covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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