Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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