i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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