Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
