You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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