I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
