are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
