Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Randomize
