brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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