My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
