I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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