Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
We had sex on a dog bed..
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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