fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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