are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
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