garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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