you mean i was at the winter classic?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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