my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I feel like a drive thru vagina
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
