I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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