downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
