I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
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